THOSE POST-MODERN DEMS

See if this makes any sense to you. Presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich (stop laughing--he is actually running even if his chances are so poor that ABC has pulled its reporter from his camp) has been having a contest aimed at bringing chicks his way. Somewhere Bill Clinton must be shaking his head, wondering "Why didn't I think of that?" But in Kucinich's case, it's somewhat legit--he's unmarried, having divorced twice (Clinton must be thinking about that one too), so the contest is about getting him dates from which he might select a First Lady (I said stop laughing--of course she'll never be First Lady, because Kucinich will never win). The spectacle of a man running for president who can't even score his own dates is amusing, but hardly inspiring in a time of war and all. Kucinich makes Neville Chamberlain look like Audie Murphy.

Anyway, some lady wins the deal and goes out on a date with Dennis the Dating Menace. It was a rousing time--policy wonk talk over oatmeal (Dennis, you're such a romantic devil). The date ends with a smooch and an endorsement (did Dean get Gore's endorsement similarly--I don't want to think about it, I'm working the whole Tipper slobberfest out of my mind, and I apologize for any mental imagery thus conjured).

Will they date again? Well, it's a little complicated:

[Gina] Santore, 34, of Maple Shade, N.J., called herself a lifelong Democrat. She said she works as a confidential aide to the Camden County sheriff in southern New Jersey and lives with her boyfriend. (my emphasis)

So....she's in some sort of semi-committed 21st century equivalent-of-marriage relationship with a guy, yet she's out on a very public date with a dude who's currently losing badly in a contest to become leader of the free world. Ooookay. What are these people--swingers? This whole thing smacks of the kind of ambition that leads people to make idiots of themselves on Blind Date.

I can't make sense of the Democrats' response to terrorism, their knee-jerk hatred of Bush, or even their dating habits now. Red-blue America has never been more divided.

And Dennis, dude, don't get your hopes up here. Gina's just using you for her 15 minutes of fame.